One
of the most prolific newcomers on the Tarnzania political scene has
been the Spitzwater Clan, a clan of shrewd Goblins that ignored that
call to Kragrock Spire that many of their brethren followed. While
the Kragrock Spire goblins were all merged into the Kragrock cheap
labor pool, quickly becoming slaves for the more powerful human over
lords of the city. The Spitzwater clan took advantage of the lack of
goblins outside the city and quickly took over their territories, all
under the watchful eye of their Thief King. The Spitzwater clan has
become a staunch ally of the wizards of Eula in their war against
Kragrock Spire, hoping to be able to liberate and then absorb the
goblins that are in the city into the fold of clan adding back into
their power.
What
I have below is the notes and histories that I have on Swizzle
Spitzwater and parts of his inner circle. As well as the rise
of the Spitzwater Clan in general.
Swizzle Spitzwater was a proud
member of the Spitzwater goblin clan, until the day that a roving
band of adventurers slaughtered his people in an effort to raid the
temple that Swizzle’s people had guarded for eons or something,
Swizzle had never payed much attention to the whole history of his
people, instead he would show up to temple guard duty hold his pointy
stick and look menacing until his shift supervisor left and then he
would ditch his station at the alarm horn and spend the rest of
his guard shift sneaking through the various traps and dangers
that the temple held. Some might argue that because of Swizzle
abandoning his post, that was the reason that his people were
murdered so ruthlessly, and throuhly, ever the optimist, Swizzle left
town remember that there had been 4 similar raids in the last 2
years, only half of them could be construed as his fault, and the
goblins had always bounced back. While it was best that people
thought he was dead he decided that it was time to travel the world,
it quickly became apparent that even despite a Goblin’s good
intentions ( or proclaimed good intentions) that he would not be
welcomed in the world of people, thankfully skulking around the
temple and dodging the attention of authority figures had
blessed Swizzle’s already sneaky and graceful nature with the
experience necessary to steal enough food and money to survive, and
eventually the joy of theft and the adrenaline of subterfuge
outweighed the necessity of food and Swizzle began to take greater
and greater risks, it was after a particularly successful night, in
which swizzle had managed to break into a Halfling home and steal
everything that wasn’t nailed down, some things that were nailed
down, and the nails, without waking a single occupant, that he set
down camp in the woods near a clearing, planning on burying his stash
the next day. Upon waking Swizzle could barely open his eyes and his
head felt foggy, trying to stand up, he realized that he was in a
cage made for a much smaller animal ( a bird perhaps). He had been
captured by the famed circus and traveling freak show of Don Pannuci,
a merciless Halfling businessman who had scouts combing the country
side looking for fresh talent and new oddities for his Halfling
crowd. Pannuci’s goblin juggler had come down with a sudden
case of outspokenness and suffered a long fire related death, So
Pannuci was in the market for a new one. Ever the showman Swizzle
agreed with out thinking and blacked out with pain as Pannuci thrust
a branding iron into his arm, marking him forever as circus property.
As years passed Swizzle gained an excellent reputation for his slight
of hand tricks, acrobatic amazements and flourishing personality
among Pannuci’s patrons, unbeknownst to them, Swizzle was also
instructed to slit and purses and grab any wallets to finance the
circus’s growing coffers. As the years passed Swizzle plotted and
waited, determined to bring down Pannuci’s fantasy circus land
around his ears all while robbing him blind. When a large dark
confused minotaur was brought in for feats of strength Swizzle
immediately felt an inexplicable companionship with him, perhaps it
was that opposites attract so thoroughly, but it was at this
time that swizzles plans finally began to be set into
motion.
Late
one night after an incredibly packed show swizzle picked his way into
the freak tent and let loose the more unsavory beasts , and began
hurling light lanterns at the several tents, causing Pannuci
and his men to panic, running about, trying to save their precious
investment. Breaking into Pannuci’s wagon, Swizzle grabbed as much
gold and affects as he could and hurried to release his brother in
captivity, the minotaur. After escape, Swizzle was followed closely
by Pannuci always staying one step in front of the diabolical
halfling. It wasn't until years later that Swizzle was able to trick
Pannuci into stepping foot inside what was an obvious goblin
encampment where he was attacked and killed. Using his gifts of
persuasion Swizzle began to lead these goblins on raids against human
settlements and caravans, eventually becoming their war chief, even
though he still prefered the title of Thief King. Eventually goblins
began to flock to Swizzle's amazing clan, changing their way of life
from a roving band, to a more settled group, and construction began
on Twistee, the first free goblin capital.
Swizzle
is small for a goblin, maxing out height wise at 3 ft even, at the
tips of his ears. His small stature and years of sneaking have made
him the optimal theif and cutpurse, and sometimes unwilling
assassian. Despite his rough hard smoking and hard drinking
exterior, Swizzle considers himself a charming fellow with a
heart of gold, despite what everyone else might say. Being of many
words, few of substance, Swizzle will try to talk his way out of any
fight before resorting to violence, and will run from almost any
fight, especially with odds that are slightly not in his favor.
Willing to bet anything except his life on any bet, from horse races
to back alley dice games, Swizzle is a chronic gambler and desperate
lady’s man. Though he is a social beacon, he only has one true
confidant, in his minotaur companion, a friend ship that defies all
the rules that Swizzle lives by, and the only person he’d ever
stake his life on, no matter the odds. Incredibly racist against all
elves, no real reason why, just really cannot stand the tall gorgeous
bastards, probably due to his small size and grizzly looks.
Other companions are considered ruebs and suckers, and fair game for
pranks, pick pocketing and general berating. He is the self
proclaimed leader of any group, and is generally never ever ever in
any real position of responsibility
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